(25) Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, (26) that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of the water by the word, (27) that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish. (28) So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. (29) For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church. (30) For we are members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones. (31) “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife and the two shall become one flesh,”. (32) This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church.

The letter to the Ephesians was written by the apostle Paul. In our verses Paul is teaching Christian duties of the husband in marriage with the purpose of illustrating the nature of the union between Christ and the church – the same mysterious and intimate relationship exists between them both. The words impose on the husband the duty/obligation of love as Christ loves the church; Christian husbands are to love their wives as their own bodies. The church belongs exclusively to Christ as husbands and wives belong in an exclusive relationship in which no other participates. All other relationships are subordinate to that of husband and wife and Paul speaks in the same terms of the union between Christ and His people.

Marital love is a commitment; it is self-sacrificing – shows itself and seeks the highest good of the one loved. It is purposeful and realistic. It is nourishing and cherishing – a permanent condition, not temporary. These were radical ideas in those ancient days that these duties imposed on Christian husbands. They were/are not a suggestion but a commandment.

I love to close with words from c.s.Lewis: ‘…ceasing to be in love need does not mean ceasing to love. Love in this second sense – love as distinct from ‘being in love’ – is not merely a feeling. It is a deep unity maintained by the will and deliberately strengthened by habit; reinforced by (in Christian marriages) the grace which both partners ask, and receive, from God. They can have this love for each other even at those moments when they do not even like each other; as you love yourself even when you do not like yourself.’